Ampers' Rants

Ampers' Humour: Colonoscopy Journal - keep your coffee away from the keyboard!

2012-02-01T21:52:00.000Z

I called my friend Andy Sable, a gastroenterologist, to make an appointment for a colonoscopy. A few days later, in his office, Andy showed me a color diagram of the colon, a lengthy organ that appears to go all over the place, at one point passing briefly through Minneapolis.Then Andy explained the colonoscopy procedure to me in a thorough, reassuring and patient manner. I nodded

Solid proof on why Socialism is doomed to fail, although it won't convinced those a sandwich short of a picnic!

2012-01-29T17:41:00.002Z

An economics teacher at a local school made a statement that he had never failed a single student before, but had recently failed an entire class. That class had insisted that, if socialism was fully adopted, no one would be poor and no one would be rich, and all would be equal. The teacher then said, "OK, we will have an experiment in this class". All grades will be averaged and everyone

The Black economy, and how we can circumvent this in one fell swoop.

2012-01-26T10:29:00.000Z

A new idea for taxation in Britain.My aim here is to create a system where we bring all the full time and part time fiddlers of taxation (as a Libertarian, I don't really agree with taxation) into the tax system, in a way which will make it impossible to avoid.We need to shift the emphasis from taxing income to taxing expenditure.Apart from my aim of bringing the crooks into the taxation system,

Mirna van Wyk talks about turning a negative into a positive.

2012-01-25T15:37:00.004Z

Mirna van Wyk Mirna is an educational psychologist from Stellenbosch. She taught at several schools, amongst others Stellenbosch High School, Bloemhof Girls’ High and Jan Kriel School for learners with barriers to learning. She is a mother, loves art, the ocean and children. Negative to Positive Some evenings when I take our dog for a walk I take a R10 along for the paper or an ice-cream. Last

Cathy Buckle's newsletter from Zimbabwe

2012-01-25T15:20:00.002Z

Cathy Buckle is writing again from Zimbabwe, her letter is below.It seems that it isn't just the Government giving trouble to the people of Zimbabwe, but natural incidents as well. This newsletter covers one of each. I include these each month because of the high readership figures for these pages as they show a lot of interest. Ampers Dear Family and Friends, All week we received increasing

Shaka Zulu, South African restaurant review (Camden Town)

2012-01-24T14:08:00.003Z

One of the most important thing to remember whether in your business life, or – as importantly – in your home life, is that the quality of the decisions you make will be

Incredible view inside the space shuttle - 360 degree view.

2011-11-26T17:04:00.001Z

Incredible photograph inside the Space Shuttle, you can use the mouse to turn left or right all around 360 degrees, and raise the view up or down. Looks very impressive in full screen mode with my 22 inch monitor. Just click on the link below. http://360vr.com/2011/06/22-discovery-flight-deck-opf_6236/index.html

What are the worse WMDs? Easy, these are the weapons of mass deception ! -- [Long]

2011-11-26T15:42:00.001Z

I came upon this page, in an interesting website that copes with a lot of other matters, including a page on how the ordinary citizen can retaliate against these powerful families. However, there are some distasteful items there and the people who wrote it were total believers of conspiracy theories. I don't want to give a link publicly but will give a link if anyone writes privately to my

TV commentator giving the one-finger salute to Obama.

2011-11-25T12:59:00.001Z

Tatiana Limanova, an award-winning journalist and host of a Russian national news show on the REN-TV channel, reported on the APEC summit in the United States, giving the one-finger salute a moment after mentioning Obama. The station’s owner is close to Vladamir Putin, Tatiana has now been fired. The video is less than half a minute. However, one copy has already been removed from YouTube so

I think it may be time to re-evaluate the Open University - what do you think?

2011-11-23T10:30:00.001Z

You are about to see a video called "How the English Language was developed". Web2Literacy states: "A fantastic series of ten 1-minute video clips outlining the evolution of the English language from Anglo-Saxon times to the Internet and Global English. "Brought to us by the Open University Learn You Tube channel and humourously narrated by Clive Anderson, The history of the English

Bentek Energy, marketing analysts in the energy sector have come up with some damning comments on wind farms

2011-11-22T11:05:00.001Z

Wind turbines increase carbon!Written by Eamonn Butler and published on the Adam Smith Institute website Tuesday, 22 November 2011 11:56Now here's an interesting mini-point. We all know that wind turbines don't work when the wind isn't blowing, which can be pretty annoying if you want to cook your Christmas dinner and the country is beset by an eery calm. So you need to maintain other methods

My vote for Android's Killer App goes to Auto Task, read what it will do for you!

2011-11-21T11:10:00.001Z

Auto Task, for me, is one of the most useful apps on my Andoid smartphone. It is a program that changes how your phone rings at certain times of the day. When you are in meetings, on a plane, or even in a restaurant. The application works with Google Calendar or your company's Outlook through Microsoft Exchange. For example, if, in your calendar's To: field you add a keyword which you have

Earwig's essay (long) on how we may change the British political system for the better.

2011-11-20T18:27:00.001Z

A New Model For Democracy by a member of Max Farquar's blog known simply as "Earwig". I have lifted this in total, unashamedly from Max's blog of which Earwig makes a lot of telling comments. The above link will take you to the article on Max's blog. However, it is exceedingly long and you need to be in a quiet place, and in a quiet frame of mind to read it and take it all in. I am not saying I

Are you one of the 64,238,159 people who have watched this incredible YouTube video?

2011-11-20T17:34:00.001Z

What a battle in the South African Kruger Park. Most of you will have probably seen this video as at November 20th 2011, just over sixty-four million hits have been recorded on this website. This is an eight minute video of a pride of lions picking out a baby Cape Buffalo from the herd for their lunch. Without wishing to spoil this fantastic story, should you be one of the very few who haven't

At last, a charity where ALL the donation goes to the sharp end. No premises, no salaries, no expenses!

2011-11-18T15:59:00.001Z

A few years ago, my wife and I found out, through a friend, of a charity in Johannesburg where all the workers work from home, are voluntary and not only work for no remuneration, but pay most of their expenses out of their own pockets. The fact that all my donations were going to the “

Humour: An amazing tramp who actually does take the piss!

2011-11-17T10:10:00.001Z

At a wine merchant the regular taster died and the director started looking for a new one to hire. A drunkard with a ragged, dirty look came to apply for the position. The director of the factory wondered how to send him away. They gave him a glass to drink. He tried it and said, "It's a Muscat , three Years old, grown on a north slope, matured in steel containers". Low grade but

Nigel Farage on the removal of publicly elected leaders

2011-11-16T12:32:00.001Z

How they must fear the wisdom of Nigel Farage when he gets up to make a speech. My Gawd, but doesn't he rub their noses deep into the mire of their own making. That's enough from me, let's enjoy the two minutes and thirty-nine seconds of the following video! Ampers

How good is University food? Would you believe as good as a top London restaurant?

2011-11-14T12:21:00.001Z

Last weekend my wife and I travelled up to Cambridge to see an old friend from the sixties with whom we still keep in touch. The journey to and from Cambridge was a nightmare, absolutely packed out with very noisy youngsters and when we walked around the city there were literally thousands of them wherever we went. Not just students, but people coming up to see friends, or just to see Cambridge.

Nigel Farage on a BBC panel with all pro-EU panellists

2011-11-14T10:38:00.001Z

Everyone here, apart from Nigel, seemed to be living in cloud cuckoo land! The problem, and this is a dangerous problem, is that these people at the head of the EU "have a dream" and because of this they will soldier on until they destroy everything they have. Having a dream tends to take people away from reality! We need to get out now. The longer we leave it, the worse it will be for

The soldiers poem - and a reminder of how some of the public treat soldiers

2011-11-14T09:42:00.001Z

A soldiers poem with the usual "send this on" message which I have stripped out. There were also a few photographs at the end, two of which I append above and below the poem. It arrived on Remembrance day but, alas, I was away from home over the long weekend or I would have put it up on Friday. THE FINAL INSPECTION The soldier stood and faced God, Which must always come to pass.He hoped

Details of the new Asus Android Pad, running (and details of) Tegra 3 and new Samsung S3.

2011-11-10T20:03:00.001Z

Asus to Launch First Quad Core Tablet – the Eee-Pad Transformer Prime Published by Minnaar Pieters on Nov 10th, 2011 Interested in a Android tablet? You might want to hold out a little. December cannot get here soon enough – the tablet world is about to be shaken up with some real processing power. You know that powerful quad core processor you might have in your PC

Very short video explains why I prefer Google+

2011-11-10T16:13:00.000Z

My advice to the new Commissioner of the Metropolitan Police (London UK)

2011-11-10T12:08:00.000Z

We have, for too long, favoured the criminal over the victim. So if anyone has the email address of the new commissioner, would they please send them a link to this blog. Without further ado, I present a short 52 second video to show how the Spanish police handle terrorism. Ampers.

Don't be too proud, there are many ways of stretching the pound in your pocket!

2011-11-09T15:56:00.002Z

When I were a wee lad my father had a habit of looking at little sayings and where he felt they didn't have enough punch, he'd change them into something a little more meaningful to a young impressionable lad. One such saying was "Take care of the pennies and the pounds will take care of themselves". "Rubbish" he thought! What would that mean to a wee lad, so he gave me the following advice which

Mirna van Wyk, from Stellenbosch on how you can make a difference.

2011-11-09T15:41:00.001Z

Mirna comes from Stellenbosch in South Africa where I was brought up as a child. This particular article of hers got through to me as, at 72, I can not remember a time in my life when I have been other than cheerful and optimistic, even when I was hospitalised in 1970 for three months having my helmet and head bashed in when involved in a motor cycle accident. Also my Army discharge

Sky news has just boiled my piss!!!

2011-11-05T13:47:00.001Z

First of all, my apologies for the coarse language but I have just been watching, on Sky news, an interview with some of the students on the 2011 Jarrow march to London.First of all, they were complaining about a government who has stopped the tax-payer funding education and they say working class people can no longer afford to go to University.Apart from this being a load of bollocks, in that

Remember, remember, the fifth of November

2011-11-05T12:34:00.000Z

Come back, Guy Fawkes, all is forgiven... ... providing you do better next time! ... enjoy the short video - well under two minutes. Ampers

The EU - where did it all go wrong?

2011-11-03T08:59:00.001Z

Although I agree with the idea of making it easier to fire people, I know a lot of socialists will hate the idea, so here is a suggestion: Let us just suspend the rules for the life of this parliament. And allow the firing of people taken on for their first twelve months of employment. After the twelve months the rules are

We can copy the EU, another EU referendum petition

2011-10-25T17:22:00.001+01:00

Why not? The EU would understand the method of keeping sending a petition for a vote until we win. Fill in your details below: https://submissions.epetitions.direct.gov.uk/petitions/20133 Let's play them at their own game? Spread the word on Facebook and Twitter, and email as many people as you can. Ampers.