PERMISSIONS:
You may link to my blog but if you want to copy my article to your own blog, please give the following credit: From "Ampers' Rants" at www.ampers.me.uk. Thank you.

APOLOGIES
I have been over zealous with political comment lately so have now accepted the offer to assemble and write for two blogs on the WatchingUK website. The "Good News" blog is for items where we have benefited from the Brexit referendum vote and the "Bad News" blog is where others have tried to damage our chances of leaving the EU.

SUBSCRIPTIONS:
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Saturday, 30 August 2014

Fear is a useful weapon to subject the meek and the less intelligent.

For example, take religion. Priests, Imams and Rabbis find fear a useful weapon in their armoury to keep their flock “on message”.

Examples include: You won't go to heaven, you will burn in hell, you won't qualify for your seventy-two virgins.
(Mind you, if you add up the hundreds of thousands of Muslims killed in the last 50 years and multiply that by 72, that's an awful lot of virgins. But I digress.)
Take politics. Labour telling their people, “Don't let the Tories in” and the Tories telling their voters “If you vote UKIP you'll get Labour”. And, Clegg telling his voters, “If you don't vote for me I'll cry!" Then, Nigel telling us, ”Vote for the others and you'll get a United States of Europe and no England”!

Wednesday, 27 August 2014

Selling your Android mobile? Are you living dangerously?

Naturally, before you part with your mobile, you'll go into Settings/System/BackupAndReset to reset your phone so that it has had all the information, apps and passwords deleted.

However, if the new owner has hacking software, he can get all this sensitive information back from your phone, as easy as reciting “That stupid idiot” three times.

But there is a way to foil the hacker, safeguard your sensitive information and passwords, and feel safe.

Sunday, 17 August 2014

Just got your 'A' levels, here's some timely advice by an old geezer!

Just got your “A” levels? Did well? Now is the time to draw up your “Lifetime” goal.

Here's what to do. [Section One]

1. First of all choose the age you want to retire.

2. Second, draw up a list, leaving six lines between, working from the age you want to retire, backwards, in five year intervals.

3. In the lhe last five years or part, list in one year segments.

Now comes the hard part.  [Section Two]

1. Decide what material assets and wealth you want when you retire. For example, a large house, a new car, maybe a yacht, and a holiday home in Gaza?

2. Then plan what you need for each five year stage to keep you on the ladder to successfully reach your goal.

3. Now fill in the one year steps to see how you can achieve your first “five year goal”.

Now the most important part. [Section Three]

Tuesday, 12 August 2014

Melanie Phillips talk entitled "Islam in Europe".

This video is from a recent talk by Melanie Phillips, the "Fleet Street" journalist. In addition, Ms Phillips has a blog which you can view here.

Ms Phillips gave a talk entitled "Islam in Europe" and I reproduce the video below.


Ampers.

Monday, 11 August 2014

Proposed changes to the salary structure of Members of Parliament in the UK

Members of Parliament proposed changes to salary.

Some say MPs earn too much, others say too little. Perhaps it is a little of both.

I have an idea of a simple salary structure which might appeal to both sides of the divide.

First term of five years.

We presently pay a salary oFurther termsf £67,060 for a backbencher at the present. I propose we raise this to £100,000 but no longer pay for second homes, subsidised meal and food purchases.

But to get high flyers I also propose the following.

If a future MP has been earning at least £150,000 a year for at least twelve consecutive months in commerce, we pay him £150,000 a year during his first term.

I also want to do something about weeding out those who don't make the step onto the ministerial ladder. And there are many in parliament who have served three or more terms who haven't made it.

Further terms

Saturday, 9 August 2014

Ampers' Humour: The £50 note

The £50 note!

In Parliament recently, a Tory MP related the following account in praise of the Prime Minister


"There was a father who gave £50 to each of his three sons and told them to buy something that would completely fill up a room.

The first son bought a load of hay for £50 -  but couldn't fill the room completely.

The second son bought a load of raw cotton for £50 – he also couldn't fill the room completely.

The third son was wise and bought a candle for 10p – he lit it and the room was completely filled with light."

The proud MP declared: "Our Prime Minister, David Cameron is like the third son. From the day he has taken charge of his office, our country has been filled with the bright light of prosperity!"

After the applause from the Tory bench died down, Nigel Farage's voice from the public gallery asked:

"So, where is the remaining  £49.90?



The whole country is asking this same question!!

Friday, 8 August 2014

Ampers Humour - be careful of your diet when you retire.

A Twitter colleague, @Battsby kindly allowed me to post this in full, the story was first published on his website today.

I hope you enjoy it as much as I did.

Ampers

PS Don't read further if you don't know what colour "Cheesy Wotsits" are.

Friday, 8 August 2014
A Change of Pace

Norman worked at the chemical plant for all his life, from the age of fifteen until he retired, earlier this year upon unexpectedly reaching the grand old milestone of sixty-five. Fifty years of breathing in noxious fumes, half a century of wading through deadly, impossibly-named solvents and still he clung on, determined to see his dotage through in peace and tranquillity, unlike the dozens who had fallen beside him over the years.

He had seen many an accident in his time, even after the intrusive attentions of the Health and Safety Executive; people succumbing to respiratory difficulties, a number of alarming, unexplained rashes which developed into hitherto unrecorded episodes of dermic trauma and a higher than normal incidence of premature hair loss and liver spots. At the plant they still spoke in hushed whispers about the time that Dave – nobody remembered his last name – drowned in the acid bath and all that was recovered was a single white wellie.

But Norman had outlived them all, so it was with some concern that a few months into his salad days he found himself seeking medical attention. The doctor was perplexed and more than a little cautious as he surveyed the gruesome spectacle of Norman’s bright orange wedding tackle. He’d never seen the like and after a cautious examination from behind the prophylactics of face mask, apron and latex gloves he was close to admitting defeat. Nervously backing away from Norman’s incandescent knackers he began his research.

Thursday, 7 August 2014

Ampers' Humour: Sometimes one is completely finished!

Here is a lovely story, one almost wishes it to have been true, from my friend Audrey in Jozi (Johannesburg).


Completed or Finished?

No dictionary has ever been able to satisfactorily define the difference between "complete" and "finished".

However, during a recent linguistic conference, held in London, and attended by some of the best linguists in the world. Samsundar Balgobin, a Guyanese linguist, was the presenter when he was asked to make that very distinction.

The question put to him by a colleague in the erudite audience was this: “Some say there is no difference between ‘complete’ and ‘finished.’  Please explain the difference in a way that is easy to understand.”

Mr. Balgobin’s response:

“When you marry the right woman, you are ‘complete.’ If you marry the wrong woman, you are ‘finished.’

And, if the right one catches you with the wrong one, you are ‘completely finished.”

His answer received a five minute standing ovation.

Ampers.

Sunday, 3 August 2014

Auditors put price tag on EU Parliament 'travelling circus'

A disgusting article, those with high blood pressure should avoid reading further.

====================


Roughly €114 million is spent every year to move the European Parliament between its Brussels and Strasbourg seats every month, according to a new assessment by the European Court of Auditors. EurActiv Germany reports. [That's £1092 million p.a.]

"Finally the Court of Auditors is sorting out the mess of numbers,” said MEP Inge Gräßle, a German Christian Democrat MEP from the European People’s Party (EPP) who chairs the Parliament's Budgetary Control committee.

Gräßle praised the release of concrete figures on the cost of having three EU seats for the European Parliament (Brussels, Strasbourg and Luxembourg).

Members of the European Parliament, their staff and files, regularly move between Brussels, which hosts committee meetings and Strasbourg, where plenary sessions are held on a monthly basis. Meanwhile, Luxembourg houses the Parliament's administrative offices.

Conducted at the request of the European Parliament, the Court of Auditors' report showed that moving all employees from Luxembourg to Brussels, alone, would save €80 million over 50 years.

Relocating the Strasbourg seat to Brussels would cut costs even more, saving an estimated €2.5 billion in the next 50 years. That amounts to €113.8 million per year, the Court of Auditors calculated.

Until recently, there were no reliable numbers outlining the additional costs and certain costs were arbitrarily included or excluded in calculations.
You can read the rest of the article here.
The debate over consolidating the Parliament’s offices has been going on for years but now, with qualitative data to back their arguments, MEPs are speaking more loudly than ever.

“The calculations finally clear the most horrific sums from Strasbourg-opponents from the table," said Gräßle.

At the same time, €113.8 million per year in doubled costs is a considerable amount, said the chairman of the European Parliament's Committee on Budgetary Control.